I feel

Photobucket I feel with my heart always. I pretty much wear it on my sleeve. I can’t always say that I can “see”. When I’m troubled and I have been for the last few weeks. I can’t “see” my spirit guide, feel her or even worse hear her. I’m troubled. My body is changing and it is causes me pain. My mind is troubled and my body hurts. I can’t “see” you. Don’t ask.

I’m like a robot waking up going to work, coming home and going to bed. People walk by me like I don’t exist. I don’t want to be here. I don’t want to be anywhere. I’m troubled.

The sun’s out and I feels its warmth and I’m trying really hard to meditate and ground myself. I want to feel like ME again. I want to hear Jade whisper in my mind’s eye.

I write and I write and today I’m writing because I want to feel better, I think I’m feeling better. Trouble is there and I’m dealing with it. My heart continues to love. My body’s pain is subsiding.

I have to be strong, responsible and sometimes I just don’t want too. Sometimes I am not capable. Sometimes I just cry. Smile people see tears. What’s wrong? Oh I just read one of those you know tear jerker emails, I reply automatically. I wipe my tears. I’m strong.

I’m feeling myself today. I’m grounded, protected and sharing my thoughts with you. I love you. I don’t care if you read or don’t read this today.
Photobucket I am at peace.

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